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| My life is trying to flip upside down on me right now and Im having to work really hard to keep my mind straight and remain thinking clearly. This isnt a bad situation thats causing this, just one that is confusing and kind of something I NEVER expected to happen. It does make me smile though to know things are finally going really well in my life. Im finally getting to be myself again, which hasnt been the case for almost 3 years now. It feels so good to not think I have to pretend anymore. I dont think I ever did, I just had it in my head that I needed to... dont ask me why, it just happened. I had a good weekend off but I have to work again tomorrow (which I do love by the way). Monday through Sunday I work every day but Thursday... yes, thats 48 hours in the next week! That will definitely bring along a pretty nice pay check, so I am not complaining about that! haha. I THINK I might even end up with overtime this pay period which would be excellent since it pays time and a half. Im working really hard to save so that I can focus on school in the fall and not be so concerned with having to get hours in at a hospital. Ill probably work maybe one shift a week just for a little extra cash and some spending money, but nothing beyond that. Well, that is assuming I end up saving like I want to this summer. Anyway, I had better go get some sleep so I have enough energy and patiece to work with my patients tomorrow  . Have a good night!
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| Well, I am in the middle of week two of my internship at Mayo. Things are still going great and Im still enjoying everything about it (ok, except the 5am wake-up time  ). I have had some interesting experiences on the unit, to say the least. There is always something new and exciting to learn about...haha. This week started with very little sleep, and I have yet to catch up! Sunday night I only got about an hour and a half of sleep, but it wasnt because of anything bad. I had a conversation with Nick, which went really well, or at least I thought it did. We had a lot to talk about since there are things that hadnt been discussed in a long time, if ever. I think there are a lot of realizations happening on both sides, which is so good. It can lead to some kind of closure to all this, which ever kind that may be (Im keeping an open mind, and am basically open to wherever God wants to take me). It did make it difficult to fall asleep after the call because I had to much on my mind, but I also know I cannot worry about things. I guess it kinda of made me start wondering what that ultimate ending is going to be for us. Will things happen to put us together, will we just be really good friends? I know it will be one of the two, simply because we are too much like two peas in a pod for it not to be. I will be happy with either, but obviously, I had my heart set on one more than the other (I know, you all think Im crazy by now). I know without a doubt that no matter what, I have 6 months until I graduate and that is the number one priority right now, well, after I finish at Mayo. NOTHING is going to stand in my way of graduation!! I think getting myself settled in life is one of the most important things as well. I am so much happier though. Im having good experiences, Ive come off a lot of meds, and theres less stress since Im not in nusring school right now. I feel like I am the real Christy again, and that is an AMAZING feeling. No matter how much I tell myself all this, I wonder and want to know what lay ahead in my future. Im happy with where I am for now, but there are things I want in the next few years. I guess only time will tell and only God really knows what is to come. Well, with that, Im going to go get some sleep. Its after 10:30 and I work again tomorrow so I NEED sleep !! More later... | | |
| Well, I am at home (well, my home for the next 9 weeks) enjoying my first day off from the job. This may be my last weekend that I have off from the way things sound! We have been told that we will be given overtime if we want it, and basically as much as we want. MN state law says that we can work 16 hour shifts, just as long as we have 8 hours between shifts. Basically that means that I could end up making a decent amount of money this summer, esp. if they continue to remain short staffed on my unit AND still have the waiting list that they have right now. We discharged several yesterday but the beds are already promised to other patients that are on the list as well as one transfer. The unit is pretty wild but I really enjoy it. We had a lot of staff there yesterday that wasnt there Wed, but they are all awesome. I finally met my main clinical coach/preceptor today. Her name is Lori and shes wonderful. I definitely learned a lot with her and know I will continue to. So my second day on the unit was far from being uneventful! I had already experienced one of our patients getting out of control on Wed, and the staff having to restrain him (although in the meantime he kicked his resident) and we had PIP training Thursday (or basically how to defend ourselves). Well, yesterday, one of my nurse's patients decided she was very angry because shed been told she could go home that day. There was a huge misunderstanding with her nursing home and her bed had been given away. This meant, she didnt have anywhere to go, so she had to be held at Mayo. She said she would smash everything in her room and would swear all the wanted and didnt care. Anyway, I got to do quite a but, including sitting in on a family conference. This was a sad experience but also very educational. Well, Im gonna finish this entry up and go finish making the cupcakes I started for Sheena's birthday. Hope everyone has a good day! | | |
| I have been in MN for 3 days, doing orientation and I absolutely love it. Things havent been this good since December, and its finally time. I knew God had me come here for a reason, and that reason is becoming more clear every day. I am healing and it feels AMAZING! I am learning SO much and meeting so many new people every day. I have had so many incredible experiences already and I cannot imagine what else it waiting for me for the next 9.5 weeks! This is definitely one of the best decisions Ive ever made! Alright, back to some other stuff so I can go for a run once it cools off a bit. | | |
| I am finally packing to go home tomorrow for about a week and a half before I head to MN for my internship!! I am so excited to be finally getting to this point. My hopes for this summer are that it will aide me in finally reaching a healing point. As I go through things in my room, I find things I didnt remember I had though, and its been interesting. I found an e-mail that I printed back in Nov. from Nick, that was written about a month and a half before he ended our engagement. The entire thing was about how perfect his life was with me in it and how he did everything for us. How he never wanted any of that to change... wow, look what month and a half can do. I guess if a month and a half can do that for him, ten weeks could potentially work miracles for me this summer! Please pray that things go well getting up there and that the summer is a blessing in my life. I will try to keep this updated so everyone knows how things are going. Also, I will have my cell with me and my laptop. I will also post an address and phone number when I get it. I hope everyone has an amazing summer, and PLEASE keep in touch with me.. even those of you on tour!! Im going to be going through withdrawl and need some kind of connection to SW and drum corps, esp. since I wont see yall until finals!! | | |
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